Lessons
by Pin Needle
Summary: Ichigo needs help talking to girls and Matsumoto has some unusual methods to teach him. One-shot


Part of the 'On' series-- I made this for my sister's b-day. Happy birthday!

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Lessons

**M**atsumoto couldn't say that she was bored. But she was. She gave a heavy sigh, laying down along the length of the couch. Staring at the ceiling, she wondered where the captain had hidden her sake. He had taken it in an attempt to make his vice-captain actually finish her work but the gesture was not welcomed. She needed alcohol to get through the day! It made her forget she had such large breast that suffocated her!

Sitting up, she shifted her body so that her feet were flat on the floor. She eyed the stack of papers on her desk. Glaring, she crossed her arms and gave a definite, "humph!" If the captain was going to take her sake, she wasn't going to bother with her duties. It didn't matter how much she liked him, that little short punk wasn't going to double one up on her!

There was a fluid knock on the door and Matsumoto jumped. Surprised, she quickly glanced down at her chest before saying, "Come in!"

The most unexpected visitor walked into the room. Ichigo Kurosaki, the ryoka boy from the human world. He blinked, looking just as shocked to find himself in her office as she was.

"Kurosaki!" She frowned. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm not to sure, I got lost." Ichigo responded, rubbing the back of his head. He gazed around the room, his eyebrows furrowing when he saw the purple and gold curtains. The place was elaborately decorated, with a beautiful green rug tucked underneath a cherry wood coffee table and white sofa. A plum-covered blanket was thrown over the couch and complimented the blooming flowers surrounding them.

Ichigo felt very overwhelmed by the sheer amount of color in the small space. Matsumoto, who preferred to lounge in her captain's office, hardly used her office. She often complained that it was tiny and made her feel claustrophobic. Looking into Ichigo's face, she could tell that he was probably feeling the same way. Well, she_ had_ meant to redecorate but between the war and her frequent outings, those plans had been put on hold.

Ichigo couldn't seem to handle anymore of this "girlishness"and tried to excuse himself. "Well, I have to go find Toshiro, so--"

"Hold up, why?" She smiled. Ichigo's arrival, quite unexpected as it may have been, was exactly what she needed to keep her mind off the papers currently taunting her.

"Um..well..." Ichigo flustered.

"Come on, take a break. Sit down!" She scooted over. "We can hung out, can't we?"

He scratched his neck, unsure of what to do. Looking at Matsumoto, he saw her patting the cushion next to her. Deciding it was best no to offend her, Ichigo slowly walked, sitting down at the edge of the couch. Hunched over, he turned his face toward hers. She was smiling, head propped up by her hand, looking as if she frequently invited strangers into her office.

_This must not be awkward for her at all!_ Ichigo thought, staring down at the bright rug.

"Sorry, I would offer you a beverage, but the captain took all of my sake." She grimaced.

"That's fine."

"So, how have you been?" She questioned. "Being the hero of the Soul Society must have people bothering you constantly, huh?"

"I don't let it--"

"You know, if it were me, I'd probably would have not really paid any attention to it." She added as an afterthought.

"Well, I really--"

"How do handle all that pressure? Must be tough!"

"You sorta just ask--"

"I bet you have a girlfriend. A handsome guy such as yourself." Matsumoto smiled at him.

"Uh..no.." Ichigo grumbled, slightly grateful that she had not been able to interrupt him this time.

Her eyes widen. "What? You don't have one?"

"N-no! Why do you sound so shock?" Ichigo glared at her slightly. This was becoming very irritating. How did Toshiro put up with her all time?

"You went through hell and back again to save Rukia and Orihime! I thought certainly that you liked at least one of them!"

"They're my friends!" He said defensively. "I would do anything to protect them!"

Matsumoto pressed her back against the arm of the couch, eying him as if considering him. Ichigo was growing increasingly uncomfortable and was about to remark when she began, "Kurosaki, who do you prefer?"

He lowered his eyelids, "What do you mean?"

She sighed. "It obvious what I'm talking about! Do you prefer Rukia's slender body or Orihime's voluptuous figure?"

Ichigo immediately looked in the other direction, flushing. "I-I don't know what you mean!"

Matsumoto blinked several times, leaning over towards him. "Kurosaki, are you so innocent that you haven't even developed your taste in women yet?"

The color in his face deepened, not daring to stare at her visibly large cleavage. What was he suppose to do? This situation was getting out of hand!"I-I noticed a girl's eyes first."

"Oh! That's a relief!' She slid closer to him, "How do you talk to them?"

"I don't!" Ichigo glared again, pushing her back. "There's no point!"

Matsumoto laughed, her hands covering her mouth. "No point? Kurosaki, I think you don't know how to talk to women, do you?"

"Look, I have to go." Ichigo said, annoyed. "This conversation is pointless."

"No need to get so defensive!" She sounded genuinely offended. "I was going to offer to help you!"

"Help me with what?"

"Your women problem!" She sighed. "Honestly! The war's over, you're a hero! You need to stop being so tense and get a girlfriend!"

"I don't have a problem." Ichigo crossed his arms, a definite expression on his face. "I'm fine."

"No you're not. Anyone who looks at you can tell you you're not!" Suddenly, she slapped the back of his head and he fell onto the floor.

"Ow! What the hell was that for?" Ichigo rubbed his throbbing head, trying to regain his posture.

"Stop denying it! Admit! I'm right!"

"I--" Ichigo blinked the stars out of his eyes, manging to get back up to his feet. "I have to go."

Matsumoto pursed her lips, gripped Ichigo's wrist and pulled him back down onto the sofa. "I'm not letting you wonder off knowing full well you have such a horrible problem!"

"Matsumoto!" Ichigo shouted. "What do I have to say to convince you I don't have a problem?"

"You're so stubborn!" She nagged, once again leaning very close to him. Her breast brushed up against his arm. "When you see a girl you like, you have to give her a signal."

Ichigo was not enjoying the situation at all. Most men would probably like the fact they were in the company of such a beautiful woman, but Ichigo just...just...he wanted this to end as quickly as possible.

Matsumoto smiled at the boy's modest nature. He could act like such a little kid! "You catch her eye, smile, give some type of gesture that tells her you're interested." Ichigo felt relief when she released his wrist and backed away. "But no winking!" She added, point her index finger at him. "That's creepy."

Ichigo made a mental note to never find himself alone with a somber Matsumoto again—that was creepy.

"Once you showed your interest, she'll respond if she is also interested. Don't ask me with what, it depends on the woman. For me, I give a slight smile and run a hand through my hair." She clapped, "Okay! Let's practice! Pretend you're in a bar and you just noticed me!" She promptly turned her head away.

"Uh...what do you want me to do?" Ichigo muttered.

She gave him a wave of her hand, "Just smile."

"Uh...okay." Ichigo, agitated, attempted to smile but turned into more of a scowl.

Matsumoto turned back around, and was about to smile when she stop. She glowered at him. "What kind of face is that? You look like you wunna kill someone."

"I wouldn't mind to at the moment." Ichigo snarled, hating the entire situation. He twitched and attempted to smile.

Matsumoto didn't even bother to hold back her laughter. "You look so weird! No wonder Rukia or Orihime or any girl for that manner, would want t date you!"

"Stop it! It's not like I want to do this!" He breathed in slowly, allowing his features to soften. He forced himself to smile and Matsumoto frowned.

"Wow! You have such a nice smile!"

"D-don't act so surprised!" He crossed his arms and started to scowl again.

"Well, I know I won't be able to make you do anything better than that." She grinned. "We'll practice next week, but for now, let's cover talking! So, how do you usually talk to you a woman you're interested in?"

"I don't have a special way." He mumbled.

She rolled her eyes. "Boy, this is going to take forever! You've got to talk to like she's special say good-morning, listen ing to her when she's talking—stuff like that. But don't go overboard! Girls your age tend to get a little anxious if you do that."

Ichigo was still looking venomous, not listening to anything Matsumoto was saying. He didn't care about any of this sort of stuff! She was keeping him against his will because she bored!

Matsumoto had not failed to notice his lack of attention. She clasped her hands together. Maybe she could make this easier for him somehow....

"You're more of a hands on learner, aren't you?" She gave him a sly smile.

"What are you talking ab--" Ichigo didn't have time to register the fact she was very close to him again.

"Have you kissed anyone, Kurosaki?"

"N-no!" Ichigo shifted his body, gripping the arms of the couch, trying to get away. "And--"

"Close your mouth! When you do kiss a woman, use a mint! Your breath might smell!" She instructed. Ichigo raised his eyebrows. Matsumoto was not being romantic in the slightest. There was no spark between Ichigo or Matsumoto. She was simply showing him how to do something and it disturb him how lightly she was taking the situation.

Ichigo felt her warm fingers on his face. He tried to pretended that those fingers belonged to someone else..someone like..like...

Matsumoto pressed her lips against his, wiping all other thoughts straight from his mind. She was gentle, soft, and did not try to press him. It was a kiss that meant nothing as much as it meant everything. Ichigo had never felt this way before. It was relaxing, almost...nice.

She broke away, smiling at Ichigo's blushing face. "There ya go! Remember, just a peck! If you're to forceful at first, some girls might not like it!"

Ichigo looked at her, and then quickly stood up. "I-I...have...to go...now..."

"Come by next week! We'll practice some more!"

He didn't say anything, walking out of the room, completely traumatized. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, so shocked by what had just taken place. He bypassed Toshiro, whom he had been looking for to begin with.

Toshiro couldn't help but notice Ichigo's unusual manner and rested against the door frame of his vice-captain's office. "Matsumoto, what did you do to him?"

She hummed. "Captain! Why do you sound so accusing! I've taught a lot of men how to kiss!"

Toshiro twitched. "Yeah, I know. I'm just glad it was in your office this time."

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**March 10, 2010: I saw mistakes, just fixing them. Thank u! **

Haha...wow. Okay, I wrote this pretty quickly, so I probably over looked a lot of details. The ending was kinda rushed but yeah. I hope you liked the characters, sis. ^^* I know they're your favorite.

Don't take this fic too seriously, for I think Ichigo is a OOC (a lot...) and I kinda made up the vice-captain's office. Not to sure if they have their own or just share with their captains...yeah, hope you enjoyed it!

And readers of Dusty, writer's block is still ensured. As of right now, I have no idea where to take the story cause I made to many plotholes without realizing it until now.


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